PCS Tips for Military Kids: How to Prepare Your Child for a Smooth Move

By: Tyrese Cook

Photography by: Katlyn Kim Photography

Why PCS Moves Are Especially Hard on Military Kids

Moving is a reality of life for military families. Just when we start to settle in, orders drop, and it’s time to say goodbye - goodbye to friends, favorite spots, and the familiarity we worked so hard to create. As adults, many of us have learned how to navigate the logistics and embrace the adventure, but for our children, every PCS (Permanent Change of Station) can feel like an emotional rollercoaster. They leave behind the only world they’ve known, step into the unknown, and search for a sense of stability in the midst of change.

The good news? With the right approach, we can make these transitions smoother, helping our children feel more in control and emotionally secure. Over the years, I’ve picked up PCS tips for military kids that have truly made each move feel a little less overwhelming and a lot more meaningful. Through trial, error, and a whole lot of grace, I’ve learned strategies that have made a difference for my little ones over the years. Here are some practical, tangible ways to prepare your children for a PCS while protecting their mental well-being.

PCS Tips for Military Kids: Tell Them Early and Keep Them Involved

It might be tempting to wait until things are finalized before telling your kids about a move, but giving them as much notice as possible helps them process the change. Talk to them about where you’re going, what to expect, and how things will look different (or the same!). Involve them in small decisions—let them help pick out a new home, research fun things to do at the next duty station, or even pack their own boxes. 

I always make a point to tell my kids in a fun but meaningful way where we are headed before we announce our move to friends and family. Typically, we share the news 2-4 months before moving. This gives them time to adjust and get excited about what’s to come, rather than feeling like the change is happening suddenly. When we were stationed at Fort Carson, we also informed their school around that same timeframe, and they hosted a going-away party for my girls. As a special send-off, they played a special farewell song specifically for my daughters, making the farewell memorable!

Help Military Kids Stay Grounded by Taking a Piece of “Home”

PCS moves can feel like a clean slate, but for kids, continuity is key. Encourage them to bring items that make their new space feel familiar—whether it’s a favorite stuffed animal, a beloved blanket, posters, or even a small jar of sand. These small but meaningful touches can help them feel grounded in the midst of change. 

When we were stationed at Fort Carson, my girls loved collecting rocks. When it was time to move, I let them pack a few things to take with them. These little reminders of a place they loved helped them feel connected and provided a sense of comfort when they started feeling homesick.

Let Kids Personalize Their New Space After a PCS

One of the quickest ways to make a new house feel like a home is by giving kids ownership of their space. Allow them to choose a theme, pick out decorations, or rearrange furniture in a way that feels comfortable to them. Their room should be their safe space—a familiar refuge while they adjust to new surroundings. 

For example, when my oldest daughters were obsessed with unicorns, I decorated their new room with unicorn bedding and pictures. 

Keep Friendships Alive After a Military Move

Leaving friends behind is one of the hardest parts of a PCS. Help your kids stay connected by setting up regular FaceTime calls, pen-pal letters, or even online gaming sessions with their friends. If they’re old enough, encourage them to exchange emails or social media contacts. Knowing they don’t have to say “goodbye” forever can make leaving a little easier. Small efforts can keep friendships alive even across miles.

In our family, we make it a priority to call home daily so our children can talk to their friends and relatives. Just because we are miles apart doesn't mean our hearts are not closely connected. Keeping those bonds strong has helped them feel less isolated and more secure.

How to Help Military Kids Find Community After a PCS

New places feel less overwhelming when you find your people and a sense of belonging. Whether it’s a homeschool co-op, youth sports team, or church group, helping your kids get plugged into activities early on can assist them in building new friendships and feeling more settled. Look for local Facebook groups, installation youth programs, or community events that align with their interests.

When we moved to South Korea, I made sure to get my girls involved in many things; this not only helped them make new friends but also gave them a sense of structure in a new environment.  

Why School Liaisons Matter for Military Families

One resource I always recommend to fellow military parents-especially during a PCS- is the School Liaison at your new duty station. These incredible professionals are often one of the best-kept secrets on base, and can make a world of a difference when it comes to helping your child transition academically. 

Whether your kids are in public school, private school, or homeschooled like ours, School Liaisons act as that bridge between military families and local educational systems. They help you figure out enrollment steps, understand state requirements, and find programs that align with your child’s needs. And if you’re homeschooling, they’re just as valuable—they can connect you to co-ops, testing resources, and enrichment opportunities you might not have known existed.

When we PCS’d to Korea, reaching out to the School Liaison was helpful; she helped answer questions about enrollment, summer programs, and extracurriculars. Knowing there was someone I could turn to for support made the transition feel a little less overwhelming and a lot more manageable.

A simple email or phone call can open the door to resources that make a big difference—not just for you, but for your child’s sense of continuity and success.

Validate Emotions: Support Your Child Through PCS Transitions

Even with the best preparation, PCS moves can bring out a mix of emotions—excitement, fear, sadness, and frustration. Instead of dismissing tough feelings, acknowledge them. Let your kids know it’s okay to feel all of those things. A simple “I know this is hard, and it’s okay to be sad” can go a long way in helping them process the transition.

When my girls share with me that they're overwhelmed, I don’t try to fix it right away. I let them feel, process, and talk through it with me. Sometimes, just knowing they have a safe space to express their emotions makes all the difference.

Keep Routines Consistent for Emotional Stability

PCS moves disrupt the familiar, but keeping small routines intact can provide stability. Whether it’s a bedtime ritual, Saturday morning pancakes, or family movie nights, maintaining these traditions can create a sense of normalcy, no matter where you are. 

In our home, we have “Club Cook,” where we turn up our favorite songs, sing, and dance together. No matter where we move, keeping this tradition has helped maintain a sense of joy and togetherness. 

Make the PCS Move an Adventure for Military Kids

Instead of framing the PCS as a disruption, turn it into an adventure. Create a travel map, start a “New Duty Station Bucket List,” or plan fun stops along the way if you’re road-tripping. Shifting the perspective from “we have to move” to “we get to explore a new place” can help kids approach the change with curiosity rather than fear. 

Before every move, I sit down with my kids and we research all the exciting places we can explore at our next duty station. When we moved to South Korea, one of the places we were most excited about visiting first was Mallipo Beach. We went for a day trip shortly after arriving on the peninsula. 

Final Thoughts: Preparing Military Children for PCS with Confidence

Military kids are some of the most resilient children, but that doesn’t mean we should take that resilience for granted. Behind their adaptability are real emotions—excitement, sadness, uncertainty, and hope—all mixed into one big transition. As parents, it’s up to us to create a sense of stability in the midst of change, to remind them that home isn’t just a place, but the people we share it with.

Through the years, I’ve learned that a little preparation goes a long way in making a house feel like home—no matter where the next set of orders takes us. And as my family prepares for yet another move, I’m grateful to have these tools to lean on once again. The process won’t be perfect, but knowing that I can help my children navigate this transition with confidence and security makes all the difference. Every PCS is a new chapter, and while goodbyes are never easy, I’m reminded that each move also brings fresh opportunities, new adventures, and another chance to grow together as a family.

More Help for the Journey Ahead

Let’s be real—moving with kids during a PCS is a lot. But you’re not in this alone. If your family is heading to Korea, there are a ton of great resources that can help make the process a little smoother and a lot less overwhelming. Whether you're just getting orders or already packing boxes, these articles can help you feel more prepared and supported:

• PCS Move to Korea Guide – Think of this as your PCS 101. From passports to packing lists, it's a solid starting point for families heading to Korea.

• Top PCS Move to Korea Resources Every Military Family Needs to Know – A go-to list of tools, apps, and support systems that can help make life a little easier once the orders drop.

• Moving Takes a Community: Moving to Korea with the Military – You don’t have to do this alone. Here’s how community can make all the difference during a big move.

• Making Korea Your New Home: A Practical Guide for Families Getting Settled in Korea – Once you land, this guide helps you figure out what comes next—housing, schools, routines, and more.

• Welcome to Korea: Recommendations and Explanations to Prepare for an Assignment on the Peninsula – This one breaks it down with tips and insights for understanding your new surroundings before you even arrive.

• Things I Wish I Knew Before Moving to Korea – Real talk from folks who’ve been there. This one’s full of honest advice you won’t find in the official guides.

• From Disempowerment to Empowerment: Navigating an Overseas PCS to Korea – A reminder that while this journey can be tough, it can also be empowering once you find your rhythm.

PCS’ing with kids takes patience, planning, and a whole lot of grace—for them and for you. You’ve got this—and these resources are here to help every step of the way.

Expert Tips for Easing the PCS Transition for Military Kids

While every military family’s PCS journey is unique, one thing is consistent—supporting our children through the changes takes intention, empathy, and a few trusted resources. Thankfully, there are some incredible organizations offering guidance to help make your child’s transition smoother and more emotionally grounded.

• The Cohen Veterans Network offers a thoughtful parent’s guide focused on helping children thrive emotionally during a PCS. It explores topics like open communication, acknowledging your child’s feelings, and building a new support system in your next location.

• Soldiers’ Angels also shares practical strategies, including encouraging kids to pack a comfort bag and helping them research their new home to reduce anxiety and increase excitement.

• Military OneSource breaks down the moving process step-by-step, offering everything from tips on maintaining routines to using the Military Kids Connect platform for emotional support.

• The Armed Services YMCA provides family-centered advice, especially for younger children, with a focus on turning moving into an opportunity for growth rather than fear.

• The U.S. Army’s PCS parenting article reinforces the importance of involving your child early in the conversation, validating their feelings, and leaning on military family programs designed to ease the burden.

These expert-backed resources are a reminder that even though military life is filled with change, we’re never without tools—or community—to help our children not just survive, but thrive during every PCS season.

Frequently Asked Questions About PCS and Military Kids

When should I tell my child about an upcoming PCS move?

It’s best to tell your child as early as possible—ideally once your orders are confirmed. This gives them time to process the news, ask questions, and feel included in the transition process. The earlier they know, the more time you have to build a sense of excitement and stability.

How can I help my military child feel more in control during a PCS move?

Involving them in age-appropriate decisions—like decorating their new room, helping plan the travel route, or choosing a goodbye activity—can help them feel empowered and more connected to the move. Even simple choices can go a long way in reducing anxiety.

What are some signs that my child may be struggling with a PCS transition?

Some common signs include sudden changes in behavior, sleep issues, emotional outbursts, withdrawal from friends or activities, and regressions in younger children. Keep communication open and check in regularly. If needed, reach out to school counselors or military family support services.

Are there resources specifically for helping military kids adjust after a PCS?

Yes! Programs like Military OneSource, Cohen Veterans Network, and Armed Services YMCA offer parent guides, emotional support tools, and activities to help kids build resilience and feel connected after a move. You can find more in the external resources section of this article.

How long does it take for most military kids to adjust after a move?

Every child is different, but many begin adjusting within the first few months—especially when routines are reestablished, new friendships are formed, and they feel supported at home. Patience, consistency, and empathy go a long way.