Overcoming Mental Health Challenges: Support for Military Families Stationed Overseas
- Tyrese Cook
- Sep 10
- 9 min read
The Emotional Load of Being Far from Home
Being stationed overseas is often portrayed as a dream, offering travel opportunities, cultural exploration, and unique experiences for the whole family. We hear it all the time, “You’re so lucky!”, “I’ve always wanted to be stationed there!”, and even “Make the most of it!”
For many of us living it day-to-day, that dream can start to feel like a quiet struggle. One we’re not always prepared for, and one that’s often overlooked. While being stationed overseas can be beautiful, it can also be mentally, emotionally, and socially overwhelming. If you've ever felt overwhelmed, emotionally drained, or like you're watching life happen from the sidelines… You're not alone, and you're not doing anything wrong.
If you're feeling stuck during an overseas assignment, know that you're not alone. Mental wellness for military life abroad isn't about thriving every day, it's about learning how to care for yourself through the complexity.
Mental Blocks Military Families Commonly Face Overseas
Most of us are prepared for the logistics of an OCONUS move: passports, shipping timelines, cultural briefings, and housing orientations. But what’s often left out of briefings and what many aren’t prepared for is the emotional weight that can be felt by your entire family.
You miss events back home
Time zones make catching up feel like a chore
Birthdays, milestones, and the special moments in our children’s lives—moments we wish we could share with grandparents, aunts, uncles, and close friends back home—often pass quietly, unnoticed. And just the same, we’re missing out on all the beautiful things unfolding in their lives too. That distance can be so loud. It can leave you feeling invisible, like life is moving on without you on both sides—and your most meaningful moments are happening quietly, unseen by the ones who matter most.
Holidays hit differently (and sometimes harder)
Friendships you thought were solid fade out with distance
You spend more time alone than you’d like to admit
These things build up. And over time, they can become blocks, not just bad moods or off days, but real barriers to your sense of connection, motivation, and mental well-being. For many military families living abroad, the adventure can feel like a double-edged sword, equal parts beauty and emotional exhaustion.
Mental Health Support for Military Families Overseas: Understanding Common Challenges
A mental block isn’t just having an off day—it’s a real interruption to how you think, feel, and function. And while everyone experiences it differently, living overseas with military life on your shoulders brings its own set of challenges that can weigh you down before you even realize it. Sometimes it doesn’t hit all at once. It shows up quietly—in your routines, your energy, your mindset.
These OCONUS-related stressors are valid and real. Acknowledging them isn’t a sign of weakness or ingratitude—it’s a step toward caring for your mental and emotional health.
A mental block can feel like:
Creative shutdown
Emotional numbness
Unexplained fatigue
Loss of interest in things you used to enjoy
Feeling like you’re stuck, even when everything looks “fine”
Overcoming anxiety overseas doesn’t mean pretending it’s not there—it means finding the tools, routines, and people that help you keep moving forward.
It’s that moment when everything around you says, explore, connect, enjoy, but your inner world quietly replies, I don’t have it in me. Every story is unique, but here are a few mental blocks I see regularly, especially in military spouses and service members navigating OCONUS life.
Common Mental Health Challenges While Living OCONUS
While mental blocks can be deeply personal, many military families face similar patterns. Below are some of the most common challenges experienced while stationed OCONUS:
Isolation
The lack of proximity to family and friends can make you feel like you’re doing life in a vacuum. And even when people surround you, you may still feel like no one truly knows you.
Culture Shock and Adjustment Fatigue
Trying to decode a new language, culture, and lifestyle on top of everyday life can take a toll. The constant “figuring things out” can lead to emotional exhaustion and withdrawal.
Lack of Belonging
If you haven’t found your “tribe” yet, you might start to believe that you never will. That belief can slowly make you feel more isolated.
Depression and Anxiety
It’s not uncommon for overseas life to intensify mental health symptoms or exacerbate preexisting conditions impacting your overall health. When routines change and stressors increase, symptoms you’ve previously managed can return. Some may even show up for the first time.
Coping with depression abroad can be especially difficult when you feel pressure to enjoy every moment. You’re not alone in that tension.
Pressure to Make the Most of It
Many people freeze under the pressure to enjoy everything. The feeling of “wasting” the opportunity or “fear of missing out” can lead to avoidance of activities, of trying new things, and of socializing.
If any of these resonate with you, know this, you are not failing. You are navigating a complicated experience with strength and intention.
Let me encourage you, there is no right way to “experience” an overseas assignment. You don’t have to become fluent in the language, travel to a new city, island, or country every weekend, or fall in love with your new duty station for your time to be valid. Sometimes, the biggest win is just finding your footing again.
Practical Tips to Support Your Mental Health Overseas
If you’ve been feeling stuck in the mud mentally, emotionally, or socially, here’s what I’ve learned and often remind myself.
Validate the Hard Stuff
There’s a difference between venting and processing. It’s okay to admit that this season is hard. It doesn’t mean you’re weak or ungrateful; it means you’re self-aware. Once we acknowledge the truth of what we’re feeling, we can stop gaslighting ourselves and open the door to start working through it. So many families feel stuck overseas—not because they’re weak, but because the weight of constant change is real.
Reclaim Structure
Life overseas can sometimes feel unstructured, especially if you’re not working as a military spouse, you’ve stepped out of your familiar roles back home, or you’re just adjusting to a heightened optempo. That lack of rhythm can lead to restlessness, an adjustment disorder, or even anxiety or depression. One of the best mental health tools is rhythm. Try creating small anchors in your day:
Morning walks
Weekly outings (even if local)
Dedicated downtime
Weekly check-ins with a friend or partner
Intentional screen time boundaries
Adjusting to military life overseas doesn’t come with a universal guidebook. It’s messy, unpredictable, and can be lonelier than many people often expect. Consistency in your routine can help settle the nervous system and give your brain predictability, something it deeply craves when everything else feels foreign.
Say Yes to Imperfect Connection
Building your community overseas can feel daunting. From forced small talk and mismatched energy to being in different seasons of life, it can be challenging to find your network of support. Sometimes, the most powerful thing you can do is reach out for emotional support, especially as a military spouse navigating life far from home.
I encourage you to show up even when you don’t feel like it. Start small. Message someone you met. You don’t have to “click” with everyone. But you’ll never find your tribe if you never try.
Connections at times can build slowly—but they do build. And you’re worth the effort it takes to feel known again.
Make Space for Joy Without Pressure
Permit yourself to experience joy in small, accessible ways, not just in the grand things. You don’t need to take a distant weekend trip to feel alive again. Instead, try one of my suggestions.
Visit a new café
Browse a local market
Create something—journaling, photography, cooking
Host a game night with friends
Plan something just for you, not the whole family
Micro-joys can add up. When we give ourselves freedom to enjoy what’s right in front of us without comparing it to someone else’s highlight reel, our mindset starts to shift.
Talk to Someone—Professionally
If you’re hitting a wall that rest, connection, and routine can’t move, you may need deeper support. There is no shame in that. If you’re wondering how military families can get mental health help abroad, know that there are options—on base, off base, and even online.
Resources for Military Mental Health Support Overseas
Mental health care is available in a variety of ways, even overseas:
Military & Family Life Counselors (MFLCs): Free, confidential, short-term counseling services for individuals, couples, and families.
Chaplains
On-Installation Behavioral Health: Available through your medical facility with your primary care manager or behavioral health department.
Off-Installation Support: Many clinics outside of your installation accept Tricare and many other insurances, often with no referral needed for mental health support. Call one close to you and see who is the right fit for your current needs.
Virtual Therapy: Many U.S.-based therapists offer telehealth that works with your schedule and time zone. Utilize Military One Source to get connected.
Peer Support Groups: Look for spouse support networks or expat groups in your area.
Therapy and mental health resources for military families overseas aren’t just for when things fall apart, they’re for building resilience too. It’s also a proactive space to unpack, recalibrate, and gain tools to continue moving forward.
If You’re in a Hard Season Right Now
You’re not behind. You’re not invisible. You’re not the only one. This season doesn’t define you. It reveals you. It reveals your capacity to keep showing up, even when it’s difficult to. It reveals the depth of what you’re carrying. And it shows that even if this chapter doesn’t feel “easy,” it can still be worth something. Through a hard season, many find growth, insight, resilience, and perspective. We don’t always get to control the pace of our adjustment. But we do get to take one step at a time. One connection. One deep breath. One honest conversation.
Final Thoughts: Your Mental Health Matters, Wherever You're Stationed
After years in the military community and multiple overseas assignments, here’s what I know:
It may feel like everyone around you is adjusting more quickly, making more friends, or “finding their groove”, but remember comparison will always steal clarity. You aren't falling behind, you are unfolding at your own pace.
It’s possible to turn things around, even if it’s slow.
Discomfort doesn't mean you’re doing it wrong. That feeling is the birthplace of change; let it speak to you, not shame you.
There’s power in naming what you’re feeling and asking for what you need.
Give yourself permission to begin again (as many times as you need).
Shift your mindset, reconnect, and embrace every season, especially the ones that require a stronger, more resilient version of you.
You don’t have to figure out every step of adjusting to military life overseas, just focus on taking the next small step.
As a military family overseas, you carry so much of the emotional load. Prioritizing your mental health isn’t selfish, it’s survival. Military life, with all its transitions and relocations, can feel relentless. But in the middle of all the movement, you matter. Your mental health matters. Your overall health and wellness matter. Your experience matters. You don’t have to be the strongest, most adventurous, or most optimistic person on your installation to be doing a good job. You just have to be honest, open to growth, and willing to keep going.
Your time overseas is still yours, even if it hasn’t looked how you thought it would.
It’s never too late to turn the page.
More Stories & Resources to Carry You Forward
Read for Reflection and Renewal
Faith-Based Resilience in Military Life
Explore Tyrese’s deeply personal reflection on keeping faith at the center—even when life feels unsteady. This piece beautifully illustrates how spiritual community can anchor you through PCS moves, isolation, and change.
Spring Reset: Journaling Your Way to Mental Clarity
When everything feels overwhelming, a simple practice like journaling can bring clarity and calm. This article walks you through accessible prompts and the emotional renewal that can happen when you give yourself space to reflect.
Feeling stretched thin? This metaphor-rich story reminds military spouses and service members that just like sunflowers, we can bloom—no matter the soil. It's a tender invitation to nurture your inner strength and hope.
Making Korea Your New Home: Practical Steps to Settle In If you’re navigating day-to-day adjustment, you’ll find relatable, actionable guidance in this post. From building community to tapping into local support systems—this one offers encouragement and pragmatic comfort.
Get Extra Support When You Need It
Military OneSource – Mental Health Support
A trusted go-to for non‑medical counseling, referrals, and resources for military families navigating stress and emotional challenges abroad.
Military OneSource – Confidential Counseling
Free, confidential counseling services—online, by phone, or in-person—available to support emotional wellness during deployments, PCS, or just when life feels heavy.
Department of Defense Psychological Health Resources
From mental health self-assessments to educational materials, this hub is especially helpful for service members and families seeking reliable, DoD-approved tools.
NAMI – Help & Support for Veterans and Military Families
A compassionate resource offering peer support, educational programs, and a sense of community, especially for families navigating mental health challenges at home or abroad.
National Military Family Association – Let’s Talk It Up!
This campaign emphasizes that talking openly about mental health strengthens families. It offers practical insights and encouragement to prioritize those honest, necessary conversations.
Mental Health America – Military Mental Health Resources
Explore approachable guides, screening tools, and help for coping with deployment, stress, reintegration, and more—designed to empower both service members and their loved ones.
Closing Thoughts
Mental health support for military families overseas isn’t just about getting through the hard days, it’s about learning to create space for healing, connection, and growth, one small step at a time.
Whether you're searching for a story that mirrors your experience or a resource to help manage today’s struggles, these internal reflections and trusted external supports are here to hold you up. You don’t have to carry it all alone, there are voices, tools, and communities reaching out to walk beside you.
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